Monday, February 2, 2015

Sunday has come and gone, Monday is here to stay....

Should I make notes about what happened yesterday? The Pats won the Super Bowl. Big deal. We sat around all day in the house and ran to Wal-Mart during the first quarter. It rained a bit last night. That's about it.

Now....

I have been talking and thinking a lot about where I am and what I can and can not do anymore.

Let's do the can-not do list first.....

1. Can not walk normal without a cane. I sit and watch people walk by either at home. in the store and I wonder IF I am ever going to get back that way?
2. Coaching softball again. Can I ever get my team back? I really want to get outside ever year and coach my team that I have coached for 32 years - it would be nice.
3. Will I ever teach again? I miss teaching but I know that will never happen again. I have given away tons of my 'stuff' and I know someone else is doing what I have always loved.
4. Sex, done and gone. To many years down the drain, to many missed opportunities.
5. Kneeling done at church, genuflect  when I walk in.
6. Getting down on the floor to do things with my grand-daughter...  it seems like such a distance memory.
7. Walking the dog. Which I do but not good.
8. Walking around the block to see and visit with my sister.
9. Seeing my brother from time to time.
10. Traveling to see my cousin in Pensacola, and OK City.
11. Visiting with my wife's sister in Dallas.

What I can do still...
1. work on the computer. My brain still works, so that  is a good thing. Think about making these lists.
2. Still go to PT and work at getting better - even thought it seems like a million miles away right no. But as they say - "  one tiny step means you are moving forward." - and I guess I am but....
3. Watching TV. Not great but at least it is something.
4. Driving. I can drive myself. I'm slow getting into the car but I can drive and go most/some places.
5. Even though it seems strange, I do like going to Wal-Mart, Target, K-Mart, Hobby Lobby, Lowes - any place with a cart. I can use the cart as a 'walker"" which is cool. I want to go to the mall but waking with a cane is tiring to say the least.
6. Sleeping 9-11 hours a night is now easy.

It feels strange to be making a list, but in the long run it makes me feel a little better. I want more of the first list but my therapist say "don't rush". we will get you there. Yes but I want it now.

I have PT today, and hate going but love going. Does that make sense? I still have Walgreens and Wal-Mart to get to.

PT was tuff today, tiring in the gym part and relaxing in the pool part.

Saw this on another blog and stole it then make some changes and like it better now...“If we knew what we were doing, we would not be here would we?”  Love it now.

I love a yes/no, to do/can't do lists.

My wife is off to youth orchestra then community band. She should be home about 8:30 tonight - just before I head off to bed. Wish I had better news for you but this is what it is for now.

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I had a very successful blog on Xanga.com for a long time but that seemed to stop when I left there for here. May could go back?

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